Ha Ha Ha!

Haydin! Oh you laughed today... Lots, I might add. Daddy cradled you with his arms extended and swung you side to side as you gazed at the fan. Talk about lots of fun things happening to you at once. So your Father and I laughed along with you which encouraged you more and more and it was the highlight of both our day! You just laughed and laughed and we were so amazed with you! 

4, 5, 6...

Our newest increments of time asleep at night. You've done only one 6 hr stretch but it sure was heaven for me. The 4 & 5 hour stretches are just as divine, much better than every 2 hours. Course, I still wake up quite often just because my body is, and has been, on so many different schedules with you. When you sleep longer than normal I still wake up and  lean over you in bed or in your bassinet to see if you are going to wake, believing in our connection, and you just keep on sleeping. I find myself exhausted and yet there I stay, leaning and looking at you. 

Barefoot and ?...

Pregnant? no. That's the way the phrase goes, yes. But it wasn't until you were here that I came down with a severe case of "mommy brain". Apparently meaning I not only forget things, am spacey, can't hold a full conversation, but am just plain not "Kate". Anyway, left the house with you yesterday for an appointment. Almost got on the interstate and realized I wasn't wearing shoes. No, didn't just take them off to drive, as I would for a road trip. Plain left the house barefoot. lol. Turned around, now slightly late for our appointment, and home to get em. Silly momma. 

Hair today...

Gone tomorrow, well not really tomorrow but soon. You are loosing quite a bit of hair Haydin and it appears it will be coming back in blonde. I am already missing your dark hair and can't picture you any other way. It's funny, not only does your hair look like your Daddy's but sometimes it even smells just like his. There is an underlying something that is the same... must be in the DNA seeping through.  

This sunrise brought to you by...

Haydin! Yes, I would say throughout my pregnancy and since you've been born, I have seen more sunrises than I have my whole life. While I'm excruciatingly tired I still feel so wonderful each time I glimpse that beauty. There is something special about early morning when everything has that hush except for the birds waking up. When the whole world seems to belong to them. Our valley, full of mountain clouds drifting through and rising. So many colors washing over things, streaming in through your bedroom window making the prisms dance with rainbows. I love the smell of the air at this time of day second best to twilight. Well, you are fussing right now so I'm done on here. Just thank you for letting me appreciate the earliest times of day. 

Size and looks...

So at 7 weeks you wear 3-6 month old clothes. The last time we weighed you was 2 weeks ago and you were 13lbs. 9ozs. approximately (had to weigh you on a package scale because you don't go back to the docs for quite some time). I imagine you are even more now. I'm constantly impressed by your hands and feet. I haven't been around a lot of babies in my life but I can tell you have very wide hands and truly some sturdy lookin' feet! Your hair is still amazing also though I have noticed it falling out a bit and maybe coming in lighter or that could just be because you are out in the sun more. You are sleeping on your belly occasionally for naps which seems to help the gas situation. I should be napping right now with you but I'm always trying to get little bits done while you are sleeping. Anyway, you are a very healthy boy. Also, your face has changed slightly, slimming a bit in the cheeks. We love it when you yawn because your face thins out and we can catch a glimpse of a little boy face. You also have this face sometimes when sleeping and Da and I alert each other to it because it's so precious. 

Your SMILE!...

Haydin Fischer...

wow, you blew my heart to bits this morning. You have been smiling lately (between 5 and 6 weeks) and it's been magical. However, this morning your Grandmother was holding you and you were doing some sweet little smiles and I was in the other room listening to the reactions, admittedly getting jealous. So I went out to see you and came up and spoke to you and you just poured out the biggest smile and shook your hands at me and it just kept going....

There you were smilin'

There I was cryin'

You melt my heart.

Photogenic...

Your Nana and I talked tonight. She says she notices something different about me in all the recent pics. My smile is a smile she's never seen before. A new one, from some new expanse of my heart. It's my smile, shinning with light, exuding pride, swelling with adoration, usurping all previous smiles...

my smile when I'm looking at you. 

On another "photo" note... I've never felt so photogenic. This is the first time in my life I haven't wanted to hide outside of the pictures. Where I haven't worried what I look like or sucked in my belly. My hair disheveled. No makeup in public, lol. Thanks for the liberation. Thanks for the inspiration. 

Bottles...

So Daddy gave you your second bottle tonight. This is really good as he craves to bond with you that way and it will give me some freedom. But I'm sad about it too, and a bit jealous. Granted being "on" all day and night for you is hard but I pride myself in giving you 110% and being good at it. It's hard for me to share that. Silly huh? Your father is so happy though and truly I am too. It feels a bit like you don't need me even though I know it's my milk. I'm sure this part will get easier too. 

The Lake...

I took you to Lake Powahtan today and we will be going there alot more this summer. You did so great! Got some sunshine, but not too much and we hung out in the shade mainly. Still, I had sunscreen on you but forgot it on myself. Momma has a charred back fur sure! Anyway, you were awake the whole time and just looking at your surroundings. I thought that was pretty cool. No fussiness from the heat or anything. I didn't take you in the water yet b/c Daddy wants to be the first one to do that. We are supposed to go to the pool tomorrow but I really don't want to with how much sun I got today. We shall see. Oh, and there was tons of wind today too, so you got lots of fresh air that way!